24 Jan

Why is it so Difficult?

Семейные Расстановки по Берту Хеллингеру в Торонто

When we have to deal with our relationships, work related or social situations, actually, any life situations, we might find this is way to difficult, annoying, irritating and so on. Why?

There could be different reasons, and one of them, probably, the most common, is when we deal with adult situations as children. Many people just look like they are adults, but really, they are children. In other words, those adult-bodies are being driven by their inner children. This is much more comfortable to deal with adult situations when being adults.

Here are a few very common symptoms of a child-driven adult when he/she faces some “challenging” life situations:
1. He often gets stuck and cannot proceed to the result
2. He often puts expectations on the people around
3. He often blames life or other people
4. He feels unloved and lonely easily
5. Everyday duties burden, irritate him

A very common example of a child-woman: she is often irritated by her children. Yes, this is pretty difficult to dial even with your own children from a childish position, and this is much more comfortable to take care of them if being an adult, someone, who is bigger and stronger than the children.

What can you do for yourself if you the above symptoms?
First, what you can do is to simply acknowledge your condition.
Relax and acknowledge your condition.
No pressure, relax, no “I must”, no judgement. This is how it is and that is it. By feeling bad about yourself you are actually separating yourself on a few parts instead of integrating. This only creates more tension and pressure.
Second, meditate on it.

And, of course, it might be very helpful to involve family constellations to work on your concern. In most of the cases it will be work with your mother and then with your father. This is what helps you to move towards your adult-self.

With Love to all our cute inner children 🙂
“Children are always good.” – a quote from Bert Helinger